Obama Declares His Last Act As President: To Fire One Up


WASHINGTON D.C.—White House sources are reporting today that President Barack Obama is looking to enliven his so-called “lame duck” period and make a bold statement about cannabis legalization in the nation’s capital. While possession and cultivation of pot was made legal in the District of Columbia in 2015, legalization efforts have been stymied by Congressional obstruction and impeded from creating a viable freemarket. “As one of my last acts as president, I plan to burn a fat one of Big Island Kush on the White House steps and share it with the fellas in the Secret Service,” says Obama. “They’ve served me well over the past eight years, and god knows I deserve a little relaxation.”