Hawaiians Create Memory Thumping Marijuana Strain

LAHAINA—Dr. Alani Pualani and Eddie Hepualaha’ole have lived on the idyllic island of Maui their entire lives. Growers of some of . . . Here
jorge cervantes

WWJD: What Would Jorge Do?

THE EMERALD TRIANGLE—There comes a time in every cannabis grower’s life when he or she wonders if they’re on the right path. Many . . . Here
weed DUI

LAPD Tests New Weed DUI Device: ‘The Donut 5000’

BOYLE HEIGHTS—The Los Angeles Police Department this week unveiled a new technology that’s leading to a flood of weed DUI arrests for . . . Here
Mars Colonization

Marijuana Grow Room Considered For 1st Mars Colonization Mission

THE RED PLANET—Scientists are considering a request by several “citizen-astronauts” (who have been selected for the first Mars . . . Here
Wisemen stoned

Evidence Suggests 3 Wisemen Were Stoned Off Their Asses

BETHLEHEM—A recently translated ancient scroll found buried deep in a cave near the Sea of Galilee has created a firestorm among . . . Here
Palm reading

Study: Palm Reading Appears 99% More Accurate After Dabbing

BOULDER—A study conducted by the Pew Research Center has found that people who dab ultra-rich cannabis concentrates just prior to palm . . . Here
Cannabis Legalization

Milk of Magnesia Stock Upset Over Cannabis Legalization

LEVERKUSEN—Drugmaker Bayer’s stock plummeted this week after a study coinciding with the runaway success of cannabis legalization . . . Here
Environmentalists Warn

Environmentalists Warn: Legalize Cannabis, Armageddon to Ensue

PASADENA—A recent study published in the journal “Nature Girl” offers a bleak picture of the planet’s environment if cannabis becomes . . . Here
Water Bong

REPORT: Water Bong Dreck a Cure for Erectile Dysfunction

FORT COLLINS—Stop!!! Don’t pour that bong water down the drain! Scientists at Colorado State University have just released findings . . . Here
Bill Maher marijuana

Bill Maher Buys Creationist Museum, Converts to Cannabis Research Center

MECCA, California—Bill Maher, the controversial host of HBO’s hit political comedy series “Real Time with Bill Maher,” was . . . Here

Monsanto Creates Extraterrestrial, Bug-zapping Cannabis Seed

ST. LOUIS—During a press conference today at Monsanto’s global headquarters in Missouri, spokeswoman Felicia Rhodes announced the seed . . . Here
Trump-related Illness

‘Trump-xiety’ Sees Medical MJ Fly Off Shelves

GILROY—“I used to be able to turn on the radio when I got in the car, but now it’s just too much for my blood pressure,” . . . Here
Hyper-realistic Bong

Fiend Makes Bong From Skull, Raves About Killer Artistic Prowess

FRESNO—In a gruesome display of savagery, local hero and pit bull rescue advocate Fred “Freddy” Czerwinski, 48, was . . . Here
cannabis enthusiasts

‘Budsitters App’ Creates a Niche in Cali Cannabis Market

SACRAMENTO—Corey Roberts is all packed up and ready to head out to the airport. A full-time financial analyst, he’s also a part-time . . . Here
CBD Dog Treats

Paraplegic CBD Dog Hero Saves Lives

DEL MAR, California—The Gambino family are counting their blessings on this clear and sunny Sunday. Enzo and Connie are with their . . . Here